Tuesday, October 5, 2004
broken thoughts
Quiet

D’abord le monde ri à moi.
Tout le monde…

sometimes it’s hard to comprehend exactly what people want for you. for all you know, the world could crash down on you and all would rejoice. pessimistic ideals flooding over the land as if God send a plague to devour all of man. All breaking thoughts crashing over the beach of lost souls. every feeling within me broken up like I'm lost. can't I live freely anymore? why can't I feel my fingers or see my own face in the clear? used to hold myself high in regard when all that was around me seemed unreal and unexplained. wanting to make all right in every way for everyone. so many small mistakes so often made it's ridiculous! all I ever wanted was to succeed yet I realize that my successes are shadowed by small failures that eventually amount to larger problems. hurts to feel like this at all. reason is imminent. learning a lesson for my selfish behavior. like I am human I can change. I will change. cannot be the person I have told myself I wasn't. need to live for him all the time and not just now or occasionally. forever... C'est tout!

ixcrisxi at 9:07:00 PM MDT

I would have made this a whole lot better, but after reading T.J's comment, mine just doesn't seem as good, lolz. All I can say is that if you ever need someone to talk to or anything at all, I'm always here for you Cristina! I know how you feel, with all of my problems that you know about, and even the stuff I haven't told you. Sometimes life can get so overwelming, that you don't know what to do about, but you can talk to me anytime. I heart you Cristina! Bisous, Stacy

Comment from missamerica1055 - 10/13/04 6:52 PM

Sometimes it's hard to know what we want for ourselves too cris, you and i know that probably better than most. Love and living shouldn't even be allowed, it's just too confusing and too hard, again we know this first hand. But when you feel alone, cold, lost, transparent; we must look to our friends to help us in our time of need, and even if you don't think they can help you know deep down that talking to your friends and spending time with them probably won't hurt.Try to stay happy Cris, Love Always, T.J.

Comment from ko55tj - 10/11/04 6:02 PM

If life was clear all would be blind, pained and burdened upon uor own time, is lost in thought with mind so far gone, now is time, the time to find ourselves in others, are the key to help, ourselves.We are all lost and do not know answers to our problems, through life and living comes our answers, others who have lived with and before you know the answers.

Comment from ko55tj - 10/10/04 11:06 PM